My mother-in-law died on New Year’s Day. She died very peacefully with my wife talking to her and rubbing her back (one of her favorite things). She was 94 and had suffered from dementia for several years. Her beloved husband died seven years ago, and most all of her generation had predeceased her. It was probably time, but a person’s death is always a loss for the survivors. Our one consolation is that she is in Heaven with grandpa now.
One thing (among many things) I have to say about grandma is that she was very organized. Her children have joked about how organized she had been, even with regard to family camping trips. There was a place for everything and everything had its place… several days in advance of leaving.
This carried through to her funeral plans as well. She had signed up for a prearranged funeral 20 years ago. She was very detailed in those arrangements, too. The one problem we ran into was that they no longer make the specific casket she had requested, so we had to pick a new one. Subject to that one hiccup, it all went smoothly. I can’t tell you how helpful a prearranged funeral is for the survivors. You don’t want to have to make all of the funeral arrangements right after you’ve lost a loved one.
And grandma had done a great job planning her estate as well. My wife was able to handle all of her medical needs because grandma had signed a medical directive. In addition, she had signed a power of attorney authorizing other children to handle financial matters. They had sold her house and her cars several years ago since she had moved in with us. She only had an investment account left and that was in her trust that we put together years ago. We know where everything is and where it goes. It should proceed smoothly as planned.
This isn’t always the case, of course. I got a call from a woman several months ago who told me that her daughters were forcing her to do an estate plan… just any plan. We set an appointment to meet, but one of her daughters called the day before to tell me that her mother had died very suddenly. So now we are tied up in an unnecessary probate estate.
And estate planning isn’t a one-and-done thing either. The laws change. Periodic reviews are helpful to avoid taxes and administration.
Give me a call if you want to talk.
